redrose66 / June 14, 2015 / Family / Encouragement
It seems that everywhere you look someone is busy with their heads down in their little own world, regardless of where you go whether you’re walking, driving, watching a movie, or playing / watching a sporting event even if you stop and look around at the shopping malls, stores, and even restaurants the majority of the people are texting, listening to music, checking their e-mails, looking at social networking site, playing an application, internetting, or doing some sort of research on their cell phones, tablets, laptops or other networking internet device.
But where are their children during these social gatherings? Who’s minding them? Are the children getting the full attention they deserve? Are they working their own devices or is the family being sociable, interacting, and enjoying one another’s company? Some parents feel that if they take the children to public places that it’s enough on their part, but the parents may not have a clue what the child really feels about certain things, or if he’s having an issue with someone /something, if they are having a misunderstanding about something, or if they need help because there’s a lack of communication.
Even at home the children are expected to be playing in their rooms, watching TV, or playing video games. The connection between child and parent has missing links leaving the child with less of an emotional attachment to the parent due to that void that’s been created. Where’s the fun creativity between the parents and child? The special quality bonding? That undivided attention that parents expect when they want a child’s attention? Respect goes both ways.
Sometimes you see the children on these devices. There may be nothing wrong with that. Yes they’re quiet and not disturbing the adults, but at what cost? Are they on them for a half hour, an hour, all day? Are they being monitored? The way I see it children have become less active, they have less patience, they tend to become more aggressive to other children due to the lack of social skills that isn’t being exercised because their too focused on their gaming devices, and less respectful with a limited amount of mannerism. Some of the games appear to be innocent but in actuality become “time robbers” taking away any potential quality time that could be better spent on quality family time , projects, outside activities, reading, learning to write or draw, or just plain ole kid fun playing chase, tag, climbing trees, even gardening or riding bikes.
I was at the park with my great nephew a couple weeks ago and noticed that the majority of the parents were on their cell phones doing whatever on them while the kiddos were out on the play area unsupervised. Now I understand that need to keep up with the latest this and new that, but the kids are not getting that bonding 101 with the family to be able to connect like they did when I grew up. It seems sad really.
Even though I may not have had the best childhood, I do have some fond memories of things that we as a family unit did that nobody can take away from me. For instance, when we were very young we all sang together while our parents played their guitars. We would go to drive-in theaters and I would eat popcorn and fall asleep on the roof of our old green station wagon. We went swimming on base,at the school pool, and at Parker Park. A few times we went camping at Lake Mathis for the weekend. We took trips to Mexico and went shopping in Reynosa where my mother learned her Mexican Grito (yodel) As teenagers we played tennis with my father on the tennis courts at Parker Park. We even went to Astroworld in Houston with some dear friends.
Since my children were little tykes, I have always set aside a designated time (regardless of my schedule) that I rarely steer from because I hold it as a treasured time that I hold dear to my heart and that is my Family Night. That’s the night my husband, me, and my children all get the opportunity to sit and share a meal with no electronic devices or distractions. Just enjoy each other’s company without judgment. In addition to Family Night, anytime my husband and I get the opportunity, considering our children are adults now, we try and take the time to either go pick up a ingredients and prepare a meal for the kiddos, pick up ice cream stuff, go to the movies, karaoke, have a few drinks, play mini golf, play at the race track, watch a Hooks game, go to a theme park, or maybe even plan a small gathering with them like a barbecue at the house or card night. We make an extra attempt to do anything that we can just to get the chance to spend time together. Because to me my children are a blessing and I love them and want to be able to spend as much time as I possibly can with them because they are my main reason for living. Considering my children are all adults now and have busy schedules it is awesome and makes us feel grateful that they still take time out to share those moments with us. Our daughter takes the time in hers and her husband’s busy schedule to come to town and visit us quiet often as well as we go and visit them as often as we are able to.
I extend this family not to just my immediate family but to my parents, siblings, nieces, nephews, cousins, children, and grandchildren included. When we have social gatherings we try and include as many of them as we can when we can. Sometimes we all get together for breakfast at a convenient location near all of us, so we can all gather and share some laughs and enjoy spending time together. We would do it more often but each of us have our own families and lives thus preoccupying our time elsewhere. Everyone is busy these days so the time we do get together is precious.
I always enjoy spending time with the family as long as there is joy and laughter. Just wish that we could do some of the activities we used to do like playing cards, going to the beach, and sitting around for no other reason but just to spend time together. We have had some barbecues not too long ago, but recently time has been slipping away it seems. We will have to work on that.
I feel this is what family is supposed to do, enjoy spending time together, helping each other in need (within reason), bonding, laughing, and having a great time just hanging out. I feel if more families spent less time taking for granted the kindness of others, spent more time taking responsibility for their own actions, less time judging each other, and more time loving each other everyone would get along with much more ease. Selfishness should never come between family members, and children should cherish their parents respecting them as should the parents return the favor, and never refrain or deny a parent the chance to bond with their other children. There should not be barriers between children and parents and vise versa.
Sometimes we just need to stop and see what’s right in front of us before it’s too late. Use your time wisely my friends and enjoy your children because there are no guarantees in life and we do not know what tomorrow will bring or take away till it does.
Copyright © 2015 by Josephine Rojas. All rights reserved.
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